Wednesday, November 30, 2011
The power of a praying woman
Do you know how it feels reading something in your Bible and reading actually what you need? You feel great, am I right? You feel like you're having butterflies in your stomach because you've prooved yourself that God is so sweet and gives you wht you really need.
But how about not reading the Word of God but... Hearing it? :)
That's way different! Hearing from the Lord what you actually needed to hear that exact tine... That's another thing..
That's humbling and honoring at the same time. It's... Sweeter!!! It's comforting... :) it' assuring!
"Ask whatever you want in my Name" - Jesus
These were the words He told me. I'm excited!!! His words to me are like a treasure... I've been reading this phrase in the Bible but I've never been thrilled the way I am now after hearing them coming from His mouth...
That's why I also decided to read The power of a praying woman. His timing is so perfect... I've just finished Lazarus awakening and sooner I'll be blogging about it. Such a changing life book ;)
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
Please...
I can't contain the goodness of the Lord in my life... I can't help but to cry while I am writing this... So, to you who is reading this, please know that the Lord has never left you and never will. In whatever situation you may be in, please know that the Lord loves you too much to see you hurt and in pain, that's why please have patience and wait for Him, He is just in the buisness of turning your situation into your favor! Please know that He can use even people that don't know you to bless you, that He can use even those unthinkable things to make you feel loved! Please just wait...
And if you are in need, though I may not know you... Let me help you in whatever ways, at the side of my blog you can see my FB account and my email address... In whatever way, please know that I want to help you... Because I myself I've experienced to be helped by someone that I don't even imagine this person would do... And, if you let me, I want to do the same with you...
For anything, I am really at your service...God loves you and I love you dearly!
And if you are in need, though I may not know you... Let me help you in whatever ways, at the side of my blog you can see my FB account and my email address... In whatever way, please know that I want to help you... Because I myself I've experienced to be helped by someone that I don't even imagine this person would do... And, if you let me, I want to do the same with you...
For anything, I am really at your service...God loves you and I love you dearly!
Monday, November 14, 2011
words left unsaid
"True love isn't just expressed in passionately whispered words or an intimate kiss or an embrace; but love is also expressed in self-control, patience, even words left unsaid." - from J.H.'s IKDG
I don't know what was in JH's mind when he wrote this phrase but he really captured the meaning of Love with just few words, with actually the exact few words!
I have never understood fully this concept until God sent me 3 disturbing dreams that made me complain for a week. The Lord was asking me to do something specifically very hard and yet wanted me to pray for that person. It was unfair! Not until I realized that maybe He was just teaching me to love that person in the way He wanted me. Through prayer. Just through prayers... I didn't pray ofcourse, as hard headed I am... And honestly I am not. I am really trying to avoid that. I just don't want me to be distracted though I know this is very selfish from me when this person, no matter what, is constantly present when I need someone. But now lil by lil I am learning to pray for that person. Learning just to pray. Without expecting, without showing anything, without caring that much, without the things I used to do in short.
I kept myself so quite not even trying to fix things (which is a miracoulous things for me). I presented my self in a professional way as much as I could. I tried to hide what's really going on in me. I tried to ignore everything and begun to accept things as they came. I kept myself silent though hurting and doubting.
There were and are many questions rolling in my mind, too much "words left undaid."
I'm not telling that I'm good in loving. oh no... If there is somedoby really good in loving is just and only God.
I don't really know what I am feeling, this is so new. Maybe, I'm just glad that the Lord, the most expert One in love matters that I ever know, is personally teaching me how to love a person the way He wants me to love...
A bit pressuring, a bit difficult. God's concept of love is so deep that sometimes the things that He wants me to do and say are so ungraspable. He makes me say and feel things that are hurting. And if somebody would tell me those things I would just burst out in to tears!
*To you,
you accepted the challenge first, and pushed me to accpet it aswell knowing it will benefit us and many. I thank you now because you didn't give up on me to make me understand all those things. I owe you alot.
Accept my sorries thought you'll never know that I am, but I believe that the Lord will speak in your heart for me.
I just love you the way the Lord is teaching me to. I secretly love you. I love you in prayer.
I don't know what was in JH's mind when he wrote this phrase but he really captured the meaning of Love with just few words, with actually the exact few words!
I have never understood fully this concept until God sent me 3 disturbing dreams that made me complain for a week. The Lord was asking me to do something specifically very hard and yet wanted me to pray for that person. It was unfair! Not until I realized that maybe He was just teaching me to love that person in the way He wanted me. Through prayer. Just through prayers... I didn't pray ofcourse, as hard headed I am... And honestly I am not. I am really trying to avoid that. I just don't want me to be distracted though I know this is very selfish from me when this person, no matter what, is constantly present when I need someone. But now lil by lil I am learning to pray for that person. Learning just to pray. Without expecting, without showing anything, without caring that much, without the things I used to do in short.
I kept myself so quite not even trying to fix things (which is a miracoulous things for me). I presented my self in a professional way as much as I could. I tried to hide what's really going on in me. I tried to ignore everything and begun to accept things as they came. I kept myself silent though hurting and doubting.
There were and are many questions rolling in my mind, too much "words left undaid."
I'm not telling that I'm good in loving. oh no... If there is somedoby really good in loving is just and only God.
I don't really know what I am feeling, this is so new. Maybe, I'm just glad that the Lord, the most expert One in love matters that I ever know, is personally teaching me how to love a person the way He wants me to love...
A bit pressuring, a bit difficult. God's concept of love is so deep that sometimes the things that He wants me to do and say are so ungraspable. He makes me say and feel things that are hurting. And if somebody would tell me those things I would just burst out in to tears!
*To you,
you accepted the challenge first, and pushed me to accpet it aswell knowing it will benefit us and many. I thank you now because you didn't give up on me to make me understand all those things. I owe you alot.
Accept my sorries thought you'll never know that I am, but I believe that the Lord will speak in your heart for me.
I just love you the way the Lord is teaching me to. I secretly love you. I love you in prayer.
Thursday, October 27, 2011
Sukdulan Biyaya
"Sa panahon na tayo ay mabaho, sa panahon na tayo ay palpak, sa panahon na tayo ay marumi at walang nagmamahal natutunan tayong yakapin at halikan ng pa-ulit ulit ng Dios Amang nag mamahal sa bawat isa sa atin."
Lazarus Awakening
Have you ever felt like no body appreciates you? Or better like the people that you expect to love, they seem not to love you? Like the people you hoped they cared, they seem not to...?
You believe that God loves the world… But sometimes you wonder if He truly loves you.
Alright! I had this burden in my heart, and I don't deny to still having it. This was the thing that God wanted me to deal with, and I am still dealing with it. Two weeks ago I really felt this strong burden, that no body really loves and cares for me. The people I hoped that they would do, seemed so indifferent and doing the exact opposite thing. I was in distress. I remember one Saturday, I was eating my lunch, and right there, I tried to hide my tears from Ma because I really felt unloved. After eating I ran to my room and cried in pain to the Lord asking to take away that burden. The more I was asking to take it away, the more my heart was getting heavier.
But there I have been reminded of His great Love, that if I would try to define and describe it I would lessen its very essence and I would just terribly fail.
God led me to read the book I bought when I was in Canada. Its title is "Lazarus Awakening". And thank God, He spoke through the story of the dead man, yet the man Jesus loves the most!
For many of us, moving the truth of God’s love from our heads to our hearts is a lifelong process. As we consider our inadequacies or grieve our shattered dreams, we find it difficult to believe that God cares for us personally.
Jesus loves you apart from anything you accomplish, apart from anything you bring. Just as He called Lazarus forth to new life, Jesus wants to free you to live fully in the light of His love, unbound from the graveclothes of fear, regret, and self-condemnation.
Hei, you... LOVE is calling your name :)
You believe that God loves the world… But sometimes you wonder if He truly loves you.
Alright! I had this burden in my heart, and I don't deny to still having it. This was the thing that God wanted me to deal with, and I am still dealing with it. Two weeks ago I really felt this strong burden, that no body really loves and cares for me. The people I hoped that they would do, seemed so indifferent and doing the exact opposite thing. I was in distress. I remember one Saturday, I was eating my lunch, and right there, I tried to hide my tears from Ma because I really felt unloved. After eating I ran to my room and cried in pain to the Lord asking to take away that burden. The more I was asking to take it away, the more my heart was getting heavier.
But there I have been reminded of His great Love, that if I would try to define and describe it I would lessen its very essence and I would just terribly fail.
God led me to read the book I bought when I was in Canada. Its title is "Lazarus Awakening". And thank God, He spoke through the story of the dead man, yet the man Jesus loves the most!
For many of us, moving the truth of God’s love from our heads to our hearts is a lifelong process. As we consider our inadequacies or grieve our shattered dreams, we find it difficult to believe that God cares for us personally.
Jesus loves you apart from anything you accomplish, apart from anything you bring. Just as He called Lazarus forth to new life, Jesus wants to free you to live fully in the light of His love, unbound from the graveclothes of fear, regret, and self-condemnation.
Hei, you... LOVE is calling your name :)
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
Tuesday, October 25, 2011
agent Bartowski
Lately I'm so in with this teleserie. It is actually my bestfriend's fault. He kept on talking about that long time ago and just because during this days I'm home doing nothing, I decided to give a try to this teleserie. I am now watching Season 3 and I just started last week! Yes! I became addicted to this. You should try it! This is one of the best teleserie I ever watched. Chuck Bartowski is the title.
Chuck Bartowski works at the Buy More, a simple guy but very special: he is the Intersect (he has all CIA's secrets in his mind) and because of that he is protected by agent Casey and Sarah. Sarah's covarage was Chuck's girlfriend. They, in short faked a relationship in order for them to protect Chuck the more. To make believe others they acted as a real couple; but... Chuck and Sarah really fel inlove. Something started quite as a game ended in something deep and serious. Work binded them, but more than that there were feelings and love. As Chuck grew and became expert controlling the intersect the CIA begun to train him as a real spy.
And the story goes on...
Chuck and Sarah's love story. I want to focus on this.
Eventually they had loved and grew feeling for each other. But as most of the time they reminded each other that was just a coverage, that in reality they are just co-workers and there was nothing between them but work alone. Feelings kept mixing with the work and most of the time the work itself paid for that. There was an instance in which Sarah proposed Chuck to ran away and start a new life, their life together, but Chuck denied thinking of what the Itersect could do for many people. And they just kept on going and doing their works ignoring their feelings as they keep always reminding themselves that "a true spy does not fall in love".
Sometimes, many times we are led to desicions between something you really want and like and love and ever desired and something you know it's good for others and you know that it's your very call.
Therefore feelings are telling you some things, you reason other things. What to choose? You don't know. You try to compromise, to give some justifications. But nothing. It's confused more than before!
We as Christians are always led to choose God's very will, which is in contrast most of the time with the things "you really want and like and love and ever desired". That's why, after seeking God's will, you still choose to do what is the best for you though you don't really like it. Though sometimes there is nothing to do with you, though it will just hurt you and cause you pain. But you still courageously take that path because you know that it will lead you toward everlasting rewards... You choose to obey to His voice, with your eyes closed.
And as you keep your journey, there are points in your life that makes you think. Why am I making everything so difficult for me? When actually I can follow what I really want.
I've been crying to the Lord lately. I kept myself in silence and let my heart speak before Him asking these things. Asking why I can't be just for a second weak, just for a second do what I really want, just for a second stop and forget my responsability and enjoy my life as every twenty years old girls do!?
And right there, I've been reminded of my purpose. I've been reminded of my dreams for the Ministry of God, I've been reminded that true life is found when you lose it! That one day I and you will be reaping all the pain and everything and say "It was worth it". That if I seek first Him everything will be added. That I can never out give Him. That He loves me. And that I love Him too.
Truth is that we don't need any other reason, any other purpose, any other inspiration because His love is inspiring enough, is a sufficient reason and a valid purpose to follow the call of our lives and simply obey Him.
Chuck Bartowski works at the Buy More, a simple guy but very special: he is the Intersect (he has all CIA's secrets in his mind) and because of that he is protected by agent Casey and Sarah. Sarah's covarage was Chuck's girlfriend. They, in short faked a relationship in order for them to protect Chuck the more. To make believe others they acted as a real couple; but... Chuck and Sarah really fel inlove. Something started quite as a game ended in something deep and serious. Work binded them, but more than that there were feelings and love. As Chuck grew and became expert controlling the intersect the CIA begun to train him as a real spy.
And the story goes on...
Chuck and Sarah's love story. I want to focus on this.
Eventually they had loved and grew feeling for each other. But as most of the time they reminded each other that was just a coverage, that in reality they are just co-workers and there was nothing between them but work alone. Feelings kept mixing with the work and most of the time the work itself paid for that. There was an instance in which Sarah proposed Chuck to ran away and start a new life, their life together, but Chuck denied thinking of what the Itersect could do for many people. And they just kept on going and doing their works ignoring their feelings as they keep always reminding themselves that "a true spy does not fall in love".
Sometimes, many times we are led to desicions between something you really want and like and love and ever desired and something you know it's good for others and you know that it's your very call.
Therefore feelings are telling you some things, you reason other things. What to choose? You don't know. You try to compromise, to give some justifications. But nothing. It's confused more than before!
We as Christians are always led to choose God's very will, which is in contrast most of the time with the things "you really want and like and love and ever desired". That's why, after seeking God's will, you still choose to do what is the best for you though you don't really like it. Though sometimes there is nothing to do with you, though it will just hurt you and cause you pain. But you still courageously take that path because you know that it will lead you toward everlasting rewards... You choose to obey to His voice, with your eyes closed.
And as you keep your journey, there are points in your life that makes you think. Why am I making everything so difficult for me? When actually I can follow what I really want.
I've been crying to the Lord lately. I kept myself in silence and let my heart speak before Him asking these things. Asking why I can't be just for a second weak, just for a second do what I really want, just for a second stop and forget my responsability and enjoy my life as every twenty years old girls do!?
And right there, I've been reminded of my purpose. I've been reminded of my dreams for the Ministry of God, I've been reminded that true life is found when you lose it! That one day I and you will be reaping all the pain and everything and say "It was worth it". That if I seek first Him everything will be added. That I can never out give Him. That He loves me. And that I love Him too.
Truth is that we don't need any other reason, any other purpose, any other inspiration because His love is inspiring enough, is a sufficient reason and a valid purpose to follow the call of our lives and simply obey Him.
changes challenges opportunities
I keep on thinking all over again about that... I can't deny the fact that I am worrying but I am giving everything to the Lord... This is another step on the water. A step of faith toward God's perfect will.
Will I be ever able? Am I the one for that? Do I fit for that? I don't know. I am not able!
Questions of doubt mixed with answers full of fear.
Lord, take me wherever I will please and honor you the most! Give us strength to do Your will, as we follow every single instruction and submit to the lead of the Holy Spirit.
BE GLORIFIED, this is the prayer of our hearts...
Will I be ever able? Am I the one for that? Do I fit for that? I don't know. I am not able!
Lord, take me wherever I will please and honor you the most! Give us strength to do Your will, as we follow every single instruction and submit to the lead of the Holy Spirit.
BE GLORIFIED, this is the prayer of our hearts...
Sunday, October 23, 2011
Home Visit
Thank you for visiting me at home... You surely are the extension of God's tender love... :)
Saturday, October 22, 2011
bronchitis
Just got home from the Hospital. This morning as I woke up I blew out blood. Ofcourse Mama and everyone were panicing - I might understand them, because it was the second time. We ran to the Hospital and, thank God, they assisted me quickly. The doctor found that I got bronchitis!
I won't be able to go to church today I guess.. Mama doesn't want me to... I'll surely miss the CYN!
Thanks to my lovely Friends for the tender care..
I won't be able to go to church today I guess.. Mama doesn't want me to... I'll surely miss the CYN!
Thanks to my lovely Friends for the tender care..
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
a look in the past
I took some of my time to read again my past posts. And I just realised how selfish I was. A blog full of ME, I, MY wants, MY desires... The time to change has come! :) ... As I discovered the purpose of my living, a purpose worth dying for I must say that the focus itself changes!
If before my focus was on the thing I wanted, I desired the most and my future husband (HAHA!), now the focus becomes my generation, my nation, my God and my family...
As God taught me to lean on Him alone, little by little His palns became so clear. He begun to wishper into my heart the things He wanted me to do, He begun to unveil my eyes to see more the big picture.
My older posts makes me really laugh! Especially those posts in which I was blogging about my "Love Life" (if I can call it so...) But the thing that makes me laugh the more is the fact that now, September 6, 2011 I can boldly say that I don't care anymore about that!!! Isnt it funny? HEHE. I don't care if one day will I be getting married or if one day I would be able to meet The Guy. (Oh, before the enemy blineded me so much about this..) It sounds crazy and uncommon from Monica, yes I know... But...
It is really great how God makes you realise of the things that really matter and makes you set aside all those things that eventually are just secondary.
Now that I found the purpose of my life I would not exchange it for any other thing! This purpose is my call. Everyday becomes clear and everyday I live makes me want to really fight for it no matter what it takes. A purpose that is worth dying for. A purpose that motivates me to do more, to strive for more and conquer more! A purpose that made me understand heppenings in the past. A purpose that inspire me not to give up.
It is a great privilege to be part and be counted as a mighty warrior in the army of the Almighty! It is an honor to serve my generation and my God! :)
If before my focus was on the thing I wanted, I desired the most and my future husband (HAHA!), now the focus becomes my generation, my nation, my God and my family...
As God taught me to lean on Him alone, little by little His palns became so clear. He begun to wishper into my heart the things He wanted me to do, He begun to unveil my eyes to see more the big picture.
My older posts makes me really laugh! Especially those posts in which I was blogging about my "Love Life" (if I can call it so...) But the thing that makes me laugh the more is the fact that now, September 6, 2011 I can boldly say that I don't care anymore about that!!! Isnt it funny? HEHE. I don't care if one day will I be getting married or if one day I would be able to meet The Guy. (Oh, before the enemy blineded me so much about this..) It sounds crazy and uncommon from Monica, yes I know... But...
It is really great how God makes you realise of the things that really matter and makes you set aside all those things that eventually are just secondary.
Now that I found the purpose of my life I would not exchange it for any other thing! This purpose is my call. Everyday becomes clear and everyday I live makes me want to really fight for it no matter what it takes. A purpose that is worth dying for. A purpose that motivates me to do more, to strive for more and conquer more! A purpose that made me understand heppenings in the past. A purpose that inspire me not to give up.
It is a great privilege to be part and be counted as a mighty warrior in the army of the Almighty! It is an honor to serve my generation and my God! :)
Monday, September 5, 2011
Hola Barcelona :)
I was very hesitating to go to Barcelona. My GirlFriends were all either at vacation with their respective families or very busy with something else. I don't know for what crazy motive I txted Ate M. and asked her to list me. I didn't want to go, infact I prepared my bag the night before. I thought I would just have a major boredom. But it revealed different! :) Can you relate when I say that God is full of surprises? Well, God indeed surprised me! Starting from the bus heading toward Barcelona. I had a very inspiring talk with a friend (the one you can see in the picture). It was like AGES that I had not conversation like that one! Many other funny and great memories took place, too good to record, but too personal.
As my friend said, "Barcelona experience was one of the happiest moment in 2011." Likewise! I've never laughed and enjoyed a vacation that much...!!! :)
Ofcourse, I always owe everything to my Master! He is so good.. I know in my heart He was the One who planned everything...
In Barcelona I lost one of my favourite earing but I found again my Spiritual Friend! :)
living my CANADIAN dream
A dream come true! An aswered prayer!!! :) Credits to God that makes all things possible, that I had the chance to step my feet on Canadian ground... More than the fellowship I had with the CYN international, more than the new friendships established, more than the delicious foods, more than the shopping malls, more than all these things, I will never forget the wonderful things God did in my life during the convention...
I had my breakthrough! The breakthrough I was longging and waiting for... All this things happened all by the grace of God and thanks also to the life of my very own S. P. (It was really a relief talking and meeting her after a year..)
During Sis. Edith's session I simply found myself on my knees giving everything to the Lord. As in EVERYTHING. Even those things I thought I would never let go of... Yes! I did it... :) He did it! Though it was really painful (believe me, I've never cried that hard to the Lord...) I believe it was the very will of the Almighty!
Canada has been a memorable place for me. Why? Because there I've learnt how to trust God's plans more than I trust my plans. I've learnt how to love Him more than I love myself. There God taught me how to depend upon on Him alone.
Canada will be always remembered as the place where I broke my Alabaster Jar...
Therefore I thank the Lord for the privilege and allowing me to worship Him :')
the return
It has been so long that I am not writing in here. And honestly I almost forget how to use Blogspot! To sum up my SUMMER 2011, I would choose the word AWSOME! :)
Yes! I thank God for this wonderful Summer He gave me. An unforgettable one! From my vacation in Canada with the Summit to my very relaxing OH YEAH vacation in Barcelona plus all the very dynamic church activities.
All praise goes out to Him!!! :) Thank you Lord!
Yes! I thank God for this wonderful Summer He gave me. An unforgettable one! From my vacation in Canada with the Summit to my very relaxing OH YEAH vacation in Barcelona plus all the very dynamic church activities.
All praise goes out to Him!!! :) Thank you Lord!
Monday, February 7, 2011
Mr. Answer
I got to know a person. I will hide his name with Mr. Answer.
Mr. Answer is actually the answer of my prayers.. I got a list with the characteristic of my ideal hubby.. (Please forgive me, after all it's February.. But I assure you, I'm not focused on this.. No! I got lot of things to do still..) Anyways..
Mr. Answer is developing the same exact characteristic that I wrote on that now-missing piece of paper for wich a long time ago I started to cry out to the Lord.
I see in Mr. Answer leadership skills. His being so prayerfull and his being so humble, his so being so sensitive to the very will of God. And it all remind me about what I wrote like 1 year ago..
I've never thought of him. That he would be Mr. Answer. Werid. But I look on him as my brother now.
Mr. Answer is actually the answer of my prayers.. I got a list with the characteristic of my ideal hubby.. (Please forgive me, after all it's February.. But I assure you, I'm not focused on this.. No! I got lot of things to do still..) Anyways..
Mr. Answer is developing the same exact characteristic that I wrote on that now-missing piece of paper for wich a long time ago I started to cry out to the Lord.
I see in Mr. Answer leadership skills. His being so prayerfull and his being so humble, his so being so sensitive to the very will of God. And it all remind me about what I wrote like 1 year ago..
I've never thought of him. That he would be Mr. Answer. Werid. But I look on him as my brother now.
the fantastic four
I will not name them one by one. Or else I will give them already the glory that they are supposed to recieve in Heaven.. But I am really blessed with the lives of this four! They are my inner inspiration.. They are the answer of my prayers! CYN Milan is now more secured because of this four who selflessly responded to God's call, who choose to risk their lives and pay the price in serving Him.
I get inspired eveytime I see them. I get re-charged!
And last Saturday we had the honor to fly with the eagles. We were given the opportunity to attend WIN's prayer meeting.. And I really hope that that kind od experience helped them to understand the more what God called them for..
I'm more than excited for them. My only prayer is that they may always realise the honor that God gave them, an honor that God choose to give just to FEW people.. And that they are part of those few.
A special thanks to the life of my Bestfriend. He is awsome maaaan! :)
I get inspired eveytime I see them. I get re-charged!
And last Saturday we had the honor to fly with the eagles. We were given the opportunity to attend WIN's prayer meeting.. And I really hope that that kind od experience helped them to understand the more what God called them for..
I'm more than excited for them. My only prayer is that they may always realise the honor that God gave them, an honor that God choose to give just to FEW people.. And that they are part of those few.
A special thanks to the life of my Bestfriend. He is awsome maaaan! :)
the fee
The price is really high.. Having people from different ages looking at you is never easy. If you fail there's a lot of chance that you'd disapoint them.. After all you canno't please everyone, but we should be always be after our integrity.. And the price is really salty! I've never thought of it. Much is given, more is required! Honestly, the task is not given to me. But God made me realized that I play a very important role. If I keep being the same old Monica, His plans could never be fulfilled in his life. This is hard.. But everytime God remembers me how He is using his life lately, the fear of the Lord increses.
And sometime, I fear talking with him. Weird. I canno't almost look straightly in his eyes because I fear that something may happen. I canno't talk to him in person, and even on the phone (I get mute everytime I intend to start a conversation..). And I canno't even express myself. Canno't share with him things that I've used to share. We didn't talk often as we were used to. And I don't know what is this. It kinda bother me. It's like I was A, and suddenly it became C, missing totally the B! I'm missing a step, I'm feeling like lost.
It's is actually happening what should be happening long time ago. The weird thing is that I'm not making any effort for it to happen. I simply know that behind this there is my big God. And if He is behind all these. All I got to do is to low my heart before is Will.
Inspite of all this, I believe that the Plan Maker is in control! He knows what He is doing. Now, there is more understanding, there is more self-control, though I really miss him alot! Missing him in a good way, in a friendly way. I just miss our laugh trips. That's all I miss... But I was saying I'm really content and amazed on how God is moving in our heart, personally and individually. I'm praying for the strength to wait.. To just to be still and make Him move alone. I'll take it as an inspiration.. I'm feeling kinda weird. A mixture of feelings. I'm happy and yet not.. But no! I should rejoice. Finally He is taking the right place of honor in our hearts, in my heart.
Oh Lord, carry me through this situation... :)
And sometime, I fear talking with him. Weird. I canno't almost look straightly in his eyes because I fear that something may happen. I canno't talk to him in person, and even on the phone (I get mute everytime I intend to start a conversation..). And I canno't even express myself. Canno't share with him things that I've used to share. We didn't talk often as we were used to. And I don't know what is this. It kinda bother me. It's like I was A, and suddenly it became C, missing totally the B! I'm missing a step, I'm feeling like lost.
It's is actually happening what should be happening long time ago. The weird thing is that I'm not making any effort for it to happen. I simply know that behind this there is my big God. And if He is behind all these. All I got to do is to low my heart before is Will.
Inspite of all this, I believe that the Plan Maker is in control! He knows what He is doing. Now, there is more understanding, there is more self-control, though I really miss him alot! Missing him in a good way, in a friendly way. I just miss our laugh trips. That's all I miss... But I was saying I'm really content and amazed on how God is moving in our heart, personally and individually. I'm praying for the strength to wait.. To just to be still and make Him move alone. I'll take it as an inspiration.. I'm feeling kinda weird. A mixture of feelings. I'm happy and yet not.. But no! I should rejoice. Finally He is taking the right place of honor in our hearts, in my heart.
Oh Lord, carry me through this situation... :)
fear...
...of the Lord!
Yes! Fear of the Lord is the answer for an healthy relationship.. :)
One day as I was praying for a person, God led me in the book of Proverbs. There we can find King Solomon's very wise saying.. God made me read a passage about wisdom.. I, then started to pray for wisdom and speak it over this person's life thinking it was for him.. But unknowingly, God was moving in my heart.. Obviusly He wanted me to pray for something deeper.. For fear of the Lord! He wanted me to fear Him.
And this is the very secret for an heathly, godly and pure relationship.. I tell you.. If you fear God, automatically He is in the center of your relationship, and you, both of you, will be able to discern the pure from the unpure and to preserve your heart blameless..
Happy Heart's month everyone :)
Yes! Fear of the Lord is the answer for an healthy relationship.. :)
One day as I was praying for a person, God led me in the book of Proverbs. There we can find King Solomon's very wise saying.. God made me read a passage about wisdom.. I, then started to pray for wisdom and speak it over this person's life thinking it was for him.. But unknowingly, God was moving in my heart.. Obviusly He wanted me to pray for something deeper.. For fear of the Lord! He wanted me to fear Him.
And this is the very secret for an heathly, godly and pure relationship.. I tell you.. If you fear God, automatically He is in the center of your relationship, and you, both of you, will be able to discern the pure from the unpure and to preserve your heart blameless..
Happy Heart's month everyone :)
Thursday, February 3, 2011
fragile
Things happened so fast. Didn't expect that in such a blink of an eye the enemy could work at his best.. But praise the Almighty, who's totally in controll of everything, He made ways for His will to be done!
I thank God.. And I want to stay with Him right now.. I need The Friend. I want Him like I've never wanted Him before. My soul is crying desperetly for His Presence.. I need a break from everything, from everyone.. I wish God could take me to our secret place, where I and Him will be standing face to face.. Ohhh! How I miss bonding with Him.. Truly that there is a vacum in our heart that nothing and no one could ever fill that empty space.. Cos that emptiness could be only filled by Him. And Him alone.
Oh Lord.. Guard my heart with The Peace that surpasses all understanding.. This I ask, in Jesus' Name.
I thank God.. And I want to stay with Him right now.. I need The Friend. I want Him like I've never wanted Him before. My soul is crying desperetly for His Presence.. I need a break from everything, from everyone.. I wish God could take me to our secret place, where I and Him will be standing face to face.. Ohhh! How I miss bonding with Him.. Truly that there is a vacum in our heart that nothing and no one could ever fill that empty space.. Cos that emptiness could be only filled by Him. And Him alone.
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
Psalm 27
1 The LORD is my light and my salvation—
whom shall I fear?
The LORD is the stronghold of my life—
of whom shall I be afraid?
2 When the wicked advance against me
to devour me,
it is my enemies and my foes
who will stumble and fall.
3 Though an army besiege me,
my heart will not fear;
though war break out against me,
even then I will be confident.
4 One thing I ask from the LORD,
this only do I seek:
that I may dwell in the house of the LORD
all the days of my life,
to gaze on the beauty of the LORD
and to seek him in his temple.
5 For in the day of trouble
he will keep me safe in his dwelling;
he will hide me in the shelter of his sacred tent
and set me high upon a rock.
6 Then my head will be exalted
above the enemies who surround me;
at his sacred tent I will sacrifice with shouts of joy;
I will sing and make music to the LORD.
7 Hear my voice when I call, LORD;
be merciful to me and answer me.
8 My heart says of you, “Seek his face!”
Your face, LORD, I will seek.
9 Do not hide your face from me,
do not turn your servant away in anger;
you have been my helper.
Do not reject me or forsake me,
God my Savior.
10 Though my father and mother forsake me,
the LORD will receive me.
11 Teach me your way, LORD;
lead me in a straight path
because of my oppressors.
12 Do not turn me over to the desire of my foes,
for false witnesses rise up against me,
spouting malicious accusations.
13 I remain confident of this:
I will see the goodness of the LORD
in the land of the living.
14 Wait for the LORD;
be strong and take heart
and wait for the LORD.
whom shall I fear?
The LORD is the stronghold of my life—
of whom shall I be afraid?
2 When the wicked advance against me
to devour me,
it is my enemies and my foes
who will stumble and fall.
3 Though an army besiege me,
my heart will not fear;
though war break out against me,
even then I will be confident.
4 One thing I ask from the LORD,
this only do I seek:
that I may dwell in the house of the LORD
all the days of my life,
to gaze on the beauty of the LORD
and to seek him in his temple.
5 For in the day of trouble
he will keep me safe in his dwelling;
he will hide me in the shelter of his sacred tent
and set me high upon a rock.
6 Then my head will be exalted
above the enemies who surround me;
at his sacred tent I will sacrifice with shouts of joy;
I will sing and make music to the LORD.
7 Hear my voice when I call, LORD;
be merciful to me and answer me.
8 My heart says of you, “Seek his face!”
Your face, LORD, I will seek.
9 Do not hide your face from me,
do not turn your servant away in anger;
you have been my helper.
Do not reject me or forsake me,
God my Savior.
10 Though my father and mother forsake me,
the LORD will receive me.
11 Teach me your way, LORD;
lead me in a straight path
because of my oppressors.
12 Do not turn me over to the desire of my foes,
for false witnesses rise up against me,
spouting malicious accusations.
13 I remain confident of this:
I will see the goodness of the LORD
in the land of the living.
14 Wait for the LORD;
be strong and take heart
and wait for the LORD.
blessings all around - chapter 4
This would be the fourth chapter of my wanna be book.. :)
The title says it all.. YES! I'm totally surrounded with blessing.. Starting from my Bestfriend and his mother..
Truly in this walk on waters of mine God will never make me feel alone, He will surely provide people to help you when you drown.. And this makes me feel very blessed!!!
Nobody knows but I am going through a very difficult situation.. In which the first people you are counting on to encourage you, are those who actually stopped to believe in you..
But praise God.. His love is ever-abounding that He showed me His care through a very thoughtfull and selfless Bestfriend, who will do E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G! As in everything just to help me.. In words and deeds! As a matter of fact.. Because he wanted to help me, he phoned his mother. O.o Asking her if she could call me and advice me.. Dear Tita tried to call me,but I was so intimidate.. That's why I didn't respond her phonecalls.
But on Sunday evening, as she was standing there and our eyes crossed once in a while.. I could not help but to approach her saying.. "Tita, may time po kayo?"
With a big smile she assured me her time a brought me to her office.. We were there, sitting..For the very first time we were not about to discuss regarding "Love matters" as we always did before.. It was something surely deeper.. I told her things that even to my Bestfriend I've never told! It seemed that we were talking about that like always.. The way she understood me, expalined me things were really awsome! Her spirit of faith, her courage, her being unstoppable.. Transfered to me.. She is such a great person, a friend, a wall of prayer.. :)
And now.. After 3 years.. As I look back and remember what God made me see that prayer meeting.. Woah! It was like yesterday.. Tita Kit was preaching, preaching about people that you will be wall of.. Wall of prayer.. I asked God to show me someone.. I saw her.. I opened my eyes and I saw her son infront of me singing, I closed my eyes and I saw again his son at her back.. And the image begun to fade..
I thought I was called to be her son's wall. Matter of fact, before my Bestfriend became my Bestfriend (we were just friends that moment) we were used to call each others.. "Wall.." We were the walls..
But now, I understand the more what I saw.. My Bestfriend's Mother is a blessing.. A wall.. :)
The title says it all.. YES! I'm totally surrounded with blessing.. Starting from my Bestfriend and his mother..
Truly in this walk on waters of mine God will never make me feel alone, He will surely provide people to help you when you drown.. And this makes me feel very blessed!!!
Nobody knows but I am going through a very difficult situation.. In which the first people you are counting on to encourage you, are those who actually stopped to believe in you..
But praise God.. His love is ever-abounding that He showed me His care through a very thoughtfull and selfless Bestfriend, who will do E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G! As in everything just to help me.. In words and deeds! As a matter of fact.. Because he wanted to help me, he phoned his mother. O.o Asking her if she could call me and advice me.. Dear Tita tried to call me,
But on Sunday evening, as she was standing there and our eyes crossed once in a while.. I could not help but to approach her saying.. "Tita, may time po kayo?"
With a big smile she assured me her time a brought me to her office.. We were there, sitting..
And now.. After 3 years.. As I look back and remember what God made me see that prayer meeting.. Woah! It was like yesterday.. Tita Kit was preaching, preaching about people that you will be wall of.. Wall of prayer.. I asked God to show me someone.. I saw her.. I opened my eyes and I saw her son infront of me singing, I closed my eyes and I saw again his son at her back.. And the image begun to fade..
I thought I was called to be her son's wall. Matter of fact, before my Bestfriend became my Bestfriend (we were just friends that moment) we were used to call each others.. "Wall.." We were the walls..
But now, I understand the more what I saw.. My Bestfriend's Mother is a blessing.. A wall.. :)
visions...
It all started during the overnight.. It was a worship service actually.. I was immersed in the Spirit of God.. As suddenly my heart's cry turned into.. "Lord, breathe in me life.." (Which the preacher of the afternoon service will mention during the ministiring time)
Then I saw a battle.. One side was formed by an army.. A black army.. The other side.. I was not able to see what was formed of.. But in the upper part of this something.. There was a breathe of wind.. It was rosy.. Very sweet.. Calm and gentle.. I think it was the Holy Spirit.. And as He reached the other army.. Their black swords were made into pieces.. But the coolest thing here is that now I know why the Spirit is called sweet.. :) People used to say.. "..Sweet fellowship of the Holy Spirit.." And it's because of His fragrance.. :) His sweet purfume.. I don't want to assume anything.. But on Saturday, it seems like I was able to feel the fragrance brought by the Spirit.. It was indeed sweet.. But a sweet I've never smelled before..
I dared not to share this things to anybody.. Since, I was afraid that it was just the work of my imagination.. But since my Bestfriend is such ajudgeless person.. (that judge not, i mean..) I dared to share it to him.. And I was really surprise.. God revealed him the same things! He saw the back army.. And God told him about the purfume.. Which I smelled during Saturday and I re-smelled on Sunday during the ministiring.. :)
Then I saw a battle.. One side was formed by an army.. A black army.. The other side.. I was not able to see what was formed of.. But in the upper part of this something.. There was a breathe of wind.. It was rosy.. Very sweet.. Calm and gentle.. I think it was the Holy Spirit.. And as He reached the other army.. Their black swords were made into pieces.. But the coolest thing here is that now I know why the Spirit is called sweet.. :) People used to say.. "..Sweet fellowship of the Holy Spirit.." And it's because of His fragrance.. :) His sweet purfume.. I don't want to assume anything.. But on Saturday, it seems like I was able to feel the fragrance brought by the Spirit.. It was indeed sweet.. But a sweet I've never smelled before..
I dared not to share this things to anybody.. Since, I was afraid that it was just the work of my imagination.. But since my Bestfriend is such a
CYN activities
It's been a while that I'm not posting in here.. I just learnt not to spend too much time in front the PC as my Bestfriend told me.. I don't know where to start.. But maybe I can recall what God did on Saturday during our YR and on Sunday during the PH..
YR - Awsome day! Ate Lorie told me that she had in mind to turn the service into a Prayer Meeting.. I joyfully agreed. I decided to share it with Israel and asked him if it would function.. After 15mins he approached me again saying that I should respond the Call.. I was scary.. I'm not really used on his serious face, which he always gives me lately.. :/ I begun to pray, I was doubting a bit, afraid in a way.. The he continued saying.. "I know God is raising warriors in the CYN, you should ask them.." And from that moment I begun to understand NOTHING! The time came.. Ate Lorie finished her teaching, I took the mic and begun to pray and worship.. And I don't actually remebered what I did.. I just remember the faces of those 4 humble people who came in front of the altar.. With selfless attitude approached the throne of God and begun to respond and embrace their call.. The number was so significant.. They were four.. The "Factastic Four"..
Two weeks before the YMT had a meeting and we ended up saying that this year the CYN will raise at least 4 WARRIORS plus me.. 5.
I am so happy, ecxited in a way for those people who responded the call of God.. This is not an easy task.. Matter of fact.. You should have the heart of intercession, or else.. You will never be effective in what you'll gonna do.. I am blessed to have them.. And I am commiting myself to help them to grow in this new level of service.. May God bless the Fantastic Four as they grow in the GRACE of our Lord Jesus, the greatest INTERCESSOR of all times! :)
PH - Praise God!!!! All glory to Him alone!!! Indeed God looks in the hearts of the people.. :)
I've been blessed with both the services.. Though in the morning there was something hindering the HS, which was confirmed by the preacher herself.. Matter of fact,the battle was indeed heavy.. I saw a lion holding the heel of a baby boy.. I begun to interceed the more.. The enemy was holding some of the people back from freedom.. But inspite of that.. The morning service went really good.. Though some misunderstanding that really pushed me down.. Not expecting those people to do such things.. :/
The afternoon service was even greater! PTL! The Presence of the Holy Spirit was indeed sovereing in that place.. I saw the same wind that I will talk about in the next post..
I am super blessed by my CYN family.. Indeed God is raising in us an UNSTOPPABLE GENERATION! :)
YR - Awsome day! Ate Lorie told me that she had in mind to turn the service into a Prayer Meeting.. I joyfully agreed. I decided to share it with Israel and asked him if it would function.. After 15mins he approached me again saying that I should respond the Call.. I was scary.. I'm not really used on his serious face, which he always gives me lately.. :/ I begun to pray, I was doubting a bit, afraid in a way.. The he continued saying.. "I know God is raising warriors in the CYN, you should ask them.." And from that moment I begun to understand NOTHING! The time came.. Ate Lorie finished her teaching, I took the mic and begun to pray and worship.. And I don't actually remebered what I did.. I just remember the faces of those 4 humble people who came in front of the altar.. With selfless attitude approached the throne of God and begun to respond and embrace their call.. The number was so significant.. They were four.. The "Factastic Four"..
Two weeks before the YMT had a meeting and we ended up saying that this year the CYN will raise at least 4 WARRIORS plus me.. 5.
I am so happy, ecxited in a way for those people who responded the call of God.. This is not an easy task.. Matter of fact.. You should have the heart of intercession, or else.. You will never be effective in what you'll gonna do.. I am blessed to have them.. And I am commiting myself to help them to grow in this new level of service.. May God bless the Fantastic Four as they grow in the GRACE of our Lord Jesus, the greatest INTERCESSOR of all times! :)
PH - Praise God!!!! All glory to Him alone!!! Indeed God looks in the hearts of the people.. :)
I've been blessed with both the services.. Though in the morning there was something hindering the HS, which was confirmed by the preacher herself.. Matter of fact,
The afternoon service was even greater! PTL! The Presence of the Holy Spirit was indeed sovereing in that place.. I saw the same wind that I will talk about in the next post..
I am super blessed by my CYN family.. Indeed God is raising in us an UNSTOPPABLE GENERATION! :)
Friday, January 28, 2011
Good Morning, Monica
Proverbs 27:6 (Amplified Bible) "Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but the kisses of an enemy are lavish and deceitful."
Have been rebuked today like no one dared to do until now.. My pride made me think that I was doing good, that I was able to make it go well.. Not until I realise that I needed help.. I thought he would be encouraging me.. But I had enough encouragement.. Matter of fact my heart became numb at inspiring words.. I needed to be rebuked! I needed to be corected and someone who has enough coourage to make me realise what I was doing..
I thank God for this person.. He is a blessing, that sometimes I am taking for granted because he is ever here.. Credits to the Almighty that used his mouth for me to wake up..
Therefore I say to myself.. Good Morning, Monica :)
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
loving patience
I'm going through kinda bad times as for now.. Inspite of these all, my God stand still faithull, my family is ever near to me and my Bestfriend is doing everything just to help me..
But, sad to say, because I myself is concious about my attitude, I am being kindarude with them :/
So true the saying that to those you love the most you reserve the worst attitude.. Arg! Why?! Maybe because you know that no matter who you become still they won't leave you alone in the midst of troubles.
And I thank the Almighty for gifting me with such great blessings.. Blessings that have LOVING PATIENCE..
Their understanding goes from etrnity to eternity, indeed!
And everyday, every hour, every minute and second I realise that I love them and treasure them!!!
But, sad to say, because I myself is concious about my attitude, I am being kinda
So true the saying that to those you love the most you reserve the worst attitude.. Arg! Why?! Maybe because you know that no matter who you become still they won't leave you alone in the midst of troubles.
And I thank the Almighty for gifting me with such great blessings.. Blessings that have LOVING PATIENCE..
Their understanding goes from etrnity to eternity, indeed!
And everyday, every hour, every minute and second I realise that I love them and treasure them!!!
PS. thankyou.
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
freedom
I wanna be free.. Free from doubts, from fears, from people's opinions, from everything that is holding me back from growing, be Monica and live the life that God has meant for me to live..
"Oh Lord.. I need more GRACE....................."
"Oh Lord.. I need more GRACE....................."
Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous. Love is NOT jelous.
Monday, January 24, 2011
weakness
Glory be to God for being my immesurable and never lacking source of strength!
The message is clear. The revelation is the same.
Therefore I conclude that there is no better place to be than dwelling in God's presence and do His perfect Will!
I was tempted so much specially last Satuday.. But true that the flesh dies in Prayer..
I feel now stronger, though the enemy is really working too. The battle is not yet over. I need more courage. I need more grace to overcome eveything. I really don't want this to pull me down. I need and I must take some action. I now know what I want. What I actually need.
I am blessed with such a great family, with a ministry that helps me to grow in His knowledge. with a very cool Bestfriend.. I could not ask for more. Life seems to perfect.But. There is just ONE thing that is messing up everything. I've been dealing with that for so much time. I need changes. I need to take some action. But how? How can I? :( It's really hard for me. Though my family and my Bestfriend are always there to remind me what to do.. Still I found myslef again and all over again at the same exact point.
It could be a very little things for many. But this. This has been the cause for a pain that I am carrying thoughout these years, this has been the cause of many tears shed, this has been the cause of my sleepless night in total agaony.
But I thank God. Indeed He has given not any situation that we canno't overcome. The power behind me is GREATER than the task ahead..
I am relying on His Spirit, depending on His power and counting on His grace to uphold me everyday.
The message is clear. The revelation is the same.
Therefore I conclude that there is no better place to be than dwelling in God's presence and do His perfect Will!
I was tempted so much specially last Satuday.. But true that the flesh dies in Prayer..
I feel now stronger, though the enemy is really working too. The battle is not yet over. I need more courage. I need more grace to overcome eveything. I really don't want this to pull me down. I need and I must take some action. I now know what I want. What I actually need.
I am blessed with such a great family, with a ministry that helps me to grow in His knowledge. with a very cool Bestfriend.. I could not ask for more. Life seems to perfect.
It could be a very little things for many. But this. This has been the cause for a pain that I am carrying thoughout these years, this has been the cause of many tears shed, this has been the cause of my sleepless night in total agaony.
But I thank God. Indeed He has given not any situation that we canno't overcome. The power behind me is GREATER than the task ahead..
I am relying on His Spirit, depending on His power and counting on His grace to uphold me everyday.
Friday, January 21, 2011
kung fu panda
Kung Fu Panda is my new favourite anime!!! :) Credits to my Bestfriend who came to visit me the other day and made me watch this awsome movie!!! The movie taught me alot.. I'm blessed with Panda. So determined, so focused on the goal, so innocent and firm. Inspite of his nothingness, but because he knew that he was chosen, he was able to stand up on his calling and though the abilities were missing, he had to worry not, because his master would have surely helped him! He undergone through hard trainings that made him capable to finish his task and at the same time his sharpening process served his master to find the inner peace. That was two way process I can say.. Both for the master and for Panda.
I can see myslef in Panda. Well, I'm not really determined as he is. All I know is that my Master is calling me to do something bigger than me! This movie really marked my heart. It inspired me alot.. Because as Panda says.. "Real warrior NEVER quits!"
I was about toquit these weeks ago.. Wanted to escape from reality, wanted to go to that place where I would have lived at ease.. But no, God remimded me that here is my battle, that if I wanted Him to bring out the Monica He ever wanted, I had to face and fight my battle.
Yes, Panda may have more courage than I. But I have a Master who's not needy to go through process because He is already Perfect. :)
And I have this GREAT Master, who is able to keep me from falling, at my side.. Training my fingers for battles!
And at the end of the movie I just realised that...
I want a PANDA for my birthday.. :D :P
I can see myslef in Panda. Well, I'm not really determined as he is. All I know is that my Master is calling me to do something bigger than me! This movie really marked my heart. It inspired me alot.. Because as Panda says.. "Real warrior NEVER quits!"
I was about to
Yes, Panda may have more courage than I. But I have a Master who's not needy to go through process because He is already Perfect. :)
And I have this GREAT Master, who is able to keep me from falling, at my side.. Training my fingers for battles!
And at the end of the movie I just realised that...
I want a PANDA for my birthday.. :D :P
my source of strength
And the first day is almost gone.. :) My body is kinda weak.. But I fully believe that whenever the spirit is strong the body gets strong aswell!!! I'm prooving myslef that His words are what I need the most. To hear is voice is the greatest privilegde.. To bow my knees before His throne is the highest calling..
I'm learning again to die on my own flesh.. Waaa, before Tita was eating a delicious apple! And wherever I look.. TV, our table.. I see food! Maaan, I'm kinda craving, but as Jesus said.. that man shall not live by bread alone but by every words that proceeds from the mouth of God! :) And most of all, that like Jesus, my food is to do the will of the Father..
TO GOD BE THE GLORY for being my never lacking source of immesurableSTRENGTH! :)
I'm learning again to die on my own flesh.. Waaa, before Tita was eating a delicious apple! And wherever I look.. TV, our table.. I see food! Maaan, I'm kinda craving, but as Jesus said.. that man shall not live by bread alone but by every words that proceeds from the mouth of God! :) And most of all, that like Jesus, my food is to do the will of the Father..
TO GOD BE THE GLORY for being my never lacking source of immesurable
care
- A: what are you thinking of?
- B: I'm thinking of you.....
- A: of me?!?! What do you mean?
- B: Yeah, of you.. In general..
May you be blessed the more, you who put always other's needs before yours!!!
Though you have millions things to think about.. Still you have time to care for me...
My prayer goes with you wherver He leads you... I care! :)
Friday, 1st day.
The enemy is decieving me.. ARGH! He wants me to defeat him huh? And this will be!!!!
I'm kindahungry :/ My tummy's strating aching.. But it's all right! I remember what a mighty warrior of God said.. "The moment your tummy is starting to complain the Lord is surely doing something.." :)
Got to soak the more my soul in His Presence!
Today God's revelation for my life is quite clear: "Real warrior NEVER quits and they fights their battle on their knees".
Yes! God is reminding me about the secret of a true warrior, which I believe He called me to be. I've been here, in this situation for so long, it's due time to make action and fight my battles first on my knees and conquer it in the spiritual realm and consequently do something, as the Scriptures say "Faith without action is dead!"
That's why now it's high time to make some action..
Through His strength, by His grace, for His glory!!! :)
I'm kinda
Got to soak the more my soul in His Presence!
Today God's revelation for my life is quite clear: "Real warrior NEVER quits and they fights their battle on their knees".
Yes! God is reminding me about the secret of a true warrior, which I believe He called me to be. I've been here, in this situation for so long, it's due time to make action and fight my battles first on my knees and conquer it in the spiritual realm and consequently do something, as the Scriptures say "Faith without action is dead!"
That's why now it's high time to make some action..
Through His strength, by His grace, for His glory!!! :)
Thursday, January 20, 2011
3 days
Gloooooryyy in the Highest! :)
My Bestfriend asked me to join his 3 days Prayer and Fasting.. Starting from Friday til Sunday.
It will serve us to be more intimate and close to God and to hear His Perfect Will. :)
I'm excited and pretty scared to know His will.. Question like, what if I don't like His Will? ...Is passing in my mind. Surely the enemy is doing his best to decive me and for me not to follow God's leading.
I personally thank God for speaking in such a way to convict my Bestfriend and consequently to make me know about His lead.
My spirit is crying for His Spirit. My soul is craving for Living Water, for the Bread of Life..
This time will be different! Surely it will bring me to an higher level of faith and service..
I'm expecting so much from the Lord during these days..
I AM EXCITED!!! And I am ready to soak in His Presence!! :)
To my readers:
If you guys have any prayer request just comment on this.. And I will be very glad to help you, at least in prayer.. :)
And yes, please pray for us during this three days!
May the Lord bless you beyond measure!
My Bestfriend asked me to join his 3 days Prayer and Fasting.. Starting from Friday til Sunday.
It will serve us to be more intimate and close to God and to hear His Perfect Will. :)
I'm excited and pretty scared to know His will.. Question like, what if I don't like His Will? ...Is passing in my mind. Surely the enemy is doing his best to decive me and for me not to follow God's leading.
I personally thank God for speaking in such a way to convict my Bestfriend and consequently to make me know about His lead.
My spirit is crying for His Spirit. My soul is craving for Living Water, for the Bread of Life..
This time will be different! Surely it will bring me to an higher level of faith and service..
I'm expecting so much from the Lord during these days..
I AM EXCITED!!! And I am ready to soak in His Presence!! :)
To my readers:
If you guys have any prayer request just comment on this.. And I will be very glad to help you, at least in prayer.. :)
And yes, please pray for us during this three days!
May the Lord bless you beyond measure!
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
idk :p
Is it a calling? Is it a desire? Is it a passion? It is just something that I want?
I DON'T KNOW :) But God is doing everything to confirm, to stir up that little zeal in my heat in helping those who are in need. Yes, because I'm having fun in helping, but maaaan! There is no such pirice that could ever buy the joy when I see people happy.. And most of all because I firmly believe that Jesus came to preach this.. Love. Yes, Love and Giving has no season. You love, you give.. Because you actually love doing so..
I had the opportunity to chat with kuya Bimboy! Waaaa. Truly he made my day!!! I didn't expect it.. He is such a great inspiration, the way he dedicated and devoted his whole life to the Lord has no comparison!
His giving heart.. His compassionate heart.. AHHH! I am praying for that!!! :)
(Wooops! He is not an idol :p)
I DON'T KNOW :) But God is doing everything to confirm, to stir up that little zeal in my heat in helping those who are in need. Yes, because I'm having fun in helping, but maaaan! There is no such pirice that could ever buy the joy when I see people happy.. And most of all because I firmly believe that Jesus came to preach this.. Love. Yes, Love and Giving has no season. You love, you give.. Because you actually love doing so..
I had the opportunity to chat with kuya Bimboy! Waaaa. Truly he made my day!!! I didn't expect it.. He is such a great inspiration, the way he dedicated and devoted his whole life to the Lord has no comparison!
His giving heart.. His compassionate heart.. AHHH! I am praying for that!!! :)
(Wooops! He is not an idol :p)
dreams
I don't know what's happening to me lately. It all started on Sunday morning that I had my very first dream of the year. My very first after that silent period that I've been through. You guys have to know that God is most of the time speaking to me through dreams.. :) Wayback 2008, it was a july-hot-afternoon, I took a nap and in my dream I saw my Bestriend saying in tagalog: "Monica, Isaiah 1:17!! It's for you.." When I woke up I took the Bible and read what was in it. And in my surprise the verse was clearly speaking about the job He wants me to do, the studies He wanted me to pursue.
Sometimes the dreams I am having are to confirm something in my life, to reveal secret things or to convict me and lead me to do something.
Matter of fact, on Sunday I dreamt about my Kuya Eis.. It was like half year we didn't talk, but in my dream the Lord was telling me to approach him: there was a bed, I laid on it because I knew it was Kuya's and when he came I just hugged him, he hugged me back and I begun to cry. That's why on Sunday I phoned him and things went really great.
I remember one time, I dreamt about people not knowing their situation, and I prayed for them. Then all of a sudden I came to know that they were promoted in the ministry, they are having bad moments, or they are appointed to teach on Sunday. God's way of revealing things are really funny and cool! :)
But this time, this morning, I had almost 3 dreams. I counted them all cos every now and then I was waken up. But among these 3 dreams all I remember is the last.
God was confirming the situation in which I was placed. It was God saying, "Hei Monica, behind all you are being thourgh there am I."
I was in Carrefour near my place with my Bestfriend and some of the CYN and a long lost high school friend who invited us all at her place. We decided to go and as everybody was running easily because the bus just came, then it was not for me. I was heavy and I had some difficulties to reach them. Matter of fact I was the last. My bestfriend tried to wait for me. Tried to stop the cars that were coming along. But nothing. The moment I was very near the bus and everyone was already inside it, and I was the only one left alone.. It went its way. Yes! The bus left me. Its number was 57, which actually I've never seen in my area. Then I took another bus 58 because I wanted to reach them even though I didn't know what stops 57 will do. 58 was empty, there were I and the driver.I pushed the button stop to at least follow the other bus and meet them but the driver didn't stopped. I got angry with the driver but he was too kind. He just said that I didn't prepotate my stop. And though my nerves were out of control, everytime that my phone was fallinf from my hands, though he was driving he minded to help me and give it to me. Then, he took me to an unknown place, so far and as I was going down from the bus he left me with this words "This is your stop..." I reach the ground and I don't remember anything else..
The revelation is clear.. It describes my actual situation.
He knows where He is leading me, He knows very well the place in which I can grow the more, be effective the more. And since no matter I do the lead is God's, I just humbly follow His leading. Believing that He is all-knowing and knows the best for me..
As I walk in His ways I pray for the strength and that He may find me always faithfull to the process..
Sometimes the dreams I am having are to confirm something in my life, to reveal secret things or to convict me and lead me to do something.
Matter of fact, on Sunday I dreamt about my Kuya Eis.. It was like half year we didn't talk, but in my dream the Lord was telling me to approach him: there was a bed, I laid on it because I knew it was Kuya's and when he came I just hugged him, he hugged me back and I begun to cry. That's why on Sunday I phoned him and things went really great.
I remember one time, I dreamt about people not knowing their situation, and I prayed for them. Then all of a sudden I came to know that they were promoted in the ministry, they are having bad moments, or they are appointed to teach on Sunday. God's way of revealing things are really funny and cool! :)
But this time, this morning, I had almost 3 dreams. I counted them all cos every now and then I was waken up. But among these 3 dreams all I remember is the last.
God was confirming the situation in which I was placed. It was God saying, "Hei Monica, behind all you are being thourgh there am I."
I was in Carrefour near my place with my Bestfriend and some of the CYN and a long lost high school friend who invited us all at her place. We decided to go and as everybody was running easily because the bus just came, then it was not for me. I was heavy and I had some difficulties to reach them. Matter of fact I was the last. My bestfriend tried to wait for me. Tried to stop the cars that were coming along. But nothing. The moment I was very near the bus and everyone was already inside it, and I was the only one left alone.. It went its way. Yes! The bus left me. Its number was 57, which actually I've never seen in my area. Then I took another bus 58 because I wanted to reach them even though I didn't know what stops 57 will do. 58 was empty, there were I and the driver.I pushed the button stop to at least follow the other bus and meet them but the driver didn't stopped. I got angry with the driver but he was too kind. He just said that I didn't prepotate my stop. And though my nerves were out of control, everytime that my phone was fallinf from my hands, though he was driving he minded to help me and give it to me. Then, he took me to an unknown place, so far and as I was going down from the bus he left me with this words "This is your stop..." I reach the ground and I don't remember anything else..
The revelation is clear.. It describes my actual situation.
He knows where He is leading me, He knows very well the place in which I can grow the more, be effective the more. And since no matter I do the lead is God's, I just humbly follow His leading. Believing that He is all-knowing and knows the best for me..
As I walk in His ways I pray for the strength and that He may find me always faithfull to the process..
Monday, January 17, 2011
desirelessness
"Better is one day in Your courts than a thousand elsewhere; I would rather be a doorkeeper in the of my God than dwell in the tents of the wicked." - Psalm 84:10
I used to recite this Bible verse in my exhortations before without knowing that I myself didn't understand at all its meaning. God opened my ears and heart this Youth Summit when Ptr. Bobot preached about "Intimacy with God" at the Leaders' Session. Until then I was used to know that verse by mind, not by heart.
As I was immersed in God's presence with almost 5.000 general of the Lord, He right there spoke to me, reminding how humble was David's desire.
He would rather be a doorkeeper in the House of God than to dwell in the tents of the wicked.
He would prefer stay one second, one minute, one day of his life in God's presence than to spend life time enjoying sinning.
He would rather stay not even in, but just at the entrance of the temple than to live a life filled with earthly pleasures.
He would rather watch the Lord from the outside of the temple (take not, he is not even involved) than to join 100% wordly thing.
This is how David's desire was humble and desireless..
I am praying for such desire.. That though the world is offering me the best, something that I've ever longed for; I would resist and choose to be the doorkeeper of His house.. Choose Him always.
This verse is deeper than I've ever imagined! It talks about being desireless.
"Desirelessness is letting go of everything you think you want, except the purpose of choosing to serve God only."
I used to recite this Bible verse in my exhortations before without knowing that I myself didn't understand at all its meaning. God opened my ears and heart this Youth Summit when Ptr. Bobot preached about "Intimacy with God" at the Leaders' Session. Until then I was used to know that verse by mind, not by heart.
As I was immersed in God's presence with almost 5.000 general of the Lord, He right there spoke to me, reminding how humble was David's desire.
He would rather be a doorkeeper in the House of God than to dwell in the tents of the wicked.
He would prefer stay one second, one minute, one day of his life in God's presence than to spend life time enjoying sinning.
He would rather stay not even in, but just at the entrance of the temple than to live a life filled with earthly pleasures.
He would rather watch the Lord from the outside of the temple (take not, he is not even involved) than to join 100% wordly thing.
This is how David's desire was humble and desireless..
I am praying for such desire.. That though the world is offering me the best, something that I've ever longed for; I would resist and choose to be the doorkeeper of His house.. Choose Him always.
This verse is deeper than I've ever imagined! It talks about being desireless.
"Desirelessness is letting go of everything you think you want, except the purpose of choosing to serve God only."
zZzZzZZz
Currently eating Hershey's Cookies and Cream!!! Delicious! :')
I can't wait anymore for my Parents' arrival! I missed them. I now undrstand that I canno't still make it without them. But surely I should learn how to stand on my own. I'm being the Mama of myslef now. Cooking, doing home's affairs.. Everything.. But I'm enjoying though I really miss them!
Anyways, this is what I was talking about..
http://www.ustream.tv/recorded/11218518
It's our kuya Bimboy's testimony.. Watch it and be inspired! Indeed GOD is alive! :)
I can't wait anymore for my Parents' arrival! I missed them. I now undrstand that I canno't still make it without them. But surely I should learn how to stand on my own. I'm being the Mama of myslef now. Cooking, doing home's affairs.. Everything.. But I'm enjoying though I really miss them!
Anyways, this is what I was talking about..
http://www.ustream.tv/recorded/11218518
It's our kuya Bimboy's testimony.. Watch it and be inspired! Indeed GOD is alive! :)
the KUYA I've never had..
I don't actually remember how our kuya-relationship started.. Maybe on Dec 2007.. We've been through many things.. We've shared good memories, our personal problems and even bad moments.. But inspite of all these things, I can always say that he is the best kuya ever. I'm not his sister biologicaly but how he treats me and how I treat him is like brotherhood relationship.. I 've always prayed for a Kuya. A kuya that could help me anytime, a kuya that could protect me and advice me in time of problems. And there I found him. I found him with his selfless heart, his giving hand (whenever I 'm hungry he gives me money!) and his wise advice.
Sometime we argue about little things, take note he is D, and I'm half D. That's why often we find ourselves in discussions. But just to confront our ideas, nothing personal, all done with love! :)
I missed him alot!!! For some reasons we stopped our comunication for like half year.. But yesterday, as I dreamt about him the night before (the message was clear: the Lord was telling me to approach him), I phoned him but that moment he was quite busy. In the evening he called me back.. Tears were flowing as he was speaking words of wisdom and encouragements over me.. The conversation went on..
I found again the same old kuya.. Ahhh!!! How I love this kuya of mine! He is the best.. Indeed he is the Kuya I've never had.. That's why I pray for him all the best in life, in any aspect of his life! That he may always find God's favor and blessing taking over his path..
Genesis Masangcay is his name :)
Yes! My Bestfriend's kuya.
Saturday, January 15, 2011
waiting upon the Lord
I am just waiting for God's perfect time, I have great news, I have to tell you so much thing.. One day.. I will :)
I simply know that it wil be beautiful :D As God's commands, as God prepared!
I am praying and looking forward for that day! It will surely come..
Don't get impartience, please wait with me as I wait upon the Lord..
As I am waiting I always include you in my prayers. Every now and then.
haays :')
Someone just called me.. :) Praise GOD for his life.. He is a blessing indeed.. And again, He demonstrated that He loves me.. He just revealed His Will in my life.. Again, the buried hope are raising for His glory.. I was hopeless and discouraged these past few days.. But his phonecall turned my view upside down! I am really surrounded with blessings. I am favored because I am His child! I am soooo loved unconditionally! And His plans for me I canno't fathom!!! Beautiful God, Wonderful Saviour, Awsome Father, All-knowing Master!!!
Thank you for all those who prayed for me.. I know you are one of them.. :)
Thank you for all those who prayed for me.. I know you are one of them.. :)
Friday, January 14, 2011
sunlight.
I was supposed to handle a group tomorrow.. But because of some inconvinience I am not able to attend the Youth Rage. I believe that God would understand me.
It seems so unfair. But for the sake of others I will. I will rather stay just at the back and push people ahead of me than letting them to stay down and me enjoying. Specially when I am talking about someone dear to me.
Good thing is that inspite of this, my relationship with God does not waver. I believe I can still worship Him wherever I am. Whatever I do.
I'm not gonna let this to ruin what God has started. I am convinced that this is just way too small for Him! :D I'm not going to give up, rather, I will fight my best! After all..
Did you ever see the sun's light turning off just because it was raining? :)
No, I won't give up now! :D
Citipointe Live - Devoted (2008)
This is the latest song that ministers me alot.. :)
Indeed what a man would gain if he loses his soul in the end?
Scriptures say that if a man loses his own life for the sake of the Master, he will find it..
Today again and all over again I decide to lose my own life for His purpose and His heart's desire..
I am now running with blinded eyes and faith is the fuel..
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